girl on the bus

by Eli

after LOST tonight i took the bus home from the Ass Chapel. the boys live at 93rd and Stone, and the bus picks up at about 85th and Stone, so it’s about a 10 minute walk to the bus. unfortunately i thought that i had left with plenty of time, and in a way i sort did: i had plenty of time to get the bus stop and see the bus roll right past me. bummer.

luckily i had my new 4GB iPod Nano with me (it is actually used, but new to me. i got it for $80 on craigslist), so i popped a squat on the bench and rocked out for about a 1/2 hour until the next bus came.

it arrived on time and i boarded, putting my $1.25 into the slot and sitting down. i sat in the first “row” of seats, the ones that face inward toward the middle of the bus and can be lifted up to make room for a wheel chair if needed. i sat on the right side (as i faced the back of the bus) up against that short wall between the inward-facing seats and the first row of forward-facing seats. immediately to my right in the first forward-facing seat was a pretty cute girl, reading a book. she was sorta punky and “alternative,” but not in an annoying way. this lack of annoyance convinced me to take a peak at what book she was reading: American Psycho.

that is like one of my favorite movies of all time, so i said:

“Hey, have you seen that movie?”
“Yeah, it’s a lot different than the book.”
“Hmm… but you like them both?”
“Yeah, have you read any thing else by [Bret Easton Ellis]?”
“No.”
“You should, he’s great.”
“OK, thanks.”

i put my head phones back on, and she continued reading her book.

it was at this point that i realized something: it is WAY to difficult to make friends in our culture. there are WAY too many cultural norms that have been established about NOT talking to strangers and NOT being “weird” and other bullshit. it’s like we aren’t supposed to connect to people unless we’ve known them for months, if not years. i just didn’t have the balls to say anything more to her because i thought that she would think i was weird. what a crock of shit!

i should have just laid it out like this:

so… i know that we don’t know each other at all, but you seem like a pretty cool person. you happen to be reading the inspiration for one of my favorite movies of all time, so that’s already one thing we have in common. i want to make sure that we hang out sometime, but at the same time i don’t want to be weird and creepy about it. what do you say?

i got off the bus thinking about all of this, and felt stupid for not going for it. why the hell not? if it bombs, it bombs, and i never see her again. if not, then i’ve made a new friend. i’ve decided that i’m going to try my hardest to not hold back in those situations anymore. if something like that presents itself, i should just go for it. what have i got to lose?

on an unrelated note: check out the comment i posted on LostReview.com. it’s hilarious.

UPDATE: now nate has posted a comment on LostReview.com as well.

UPDATE: i don’t know if y’all read the comments, but i posted on craigslist under “missed connections” in regards to this incident. i put it up early thursday morning and sometime this afternoon i GOT A RESPONSE! can you fucking believe it? anyhoo, there is a real chance that this is fake, but i’ll keep you posted.

UPDATE: i’ve been had by ace venture pet detective. nate hired one of his goons to reply to my post and trick me. the funny thing is, though, that in an effort to try and verify that this person was legit, i did some searching on myspace. it certainly didn’t register then like it’s registering now, but the only person that matched my searches lived in minneapolis. i thought, “that can’t be right…” looking back on it i should have suspected nate, but i didn’t… touché.