the past couple days have involved quite a bit of dumpster diving. among many other things, we have come into the possession of a shit load of juice and a shit load of shoes. go figure. we skimmed through the shoes and took what we wanted; we filled the fridge and freezer with as much juice as possible; we still had more of both. we gave away what we could to our friends around the area, but still we had more.
yesterday, shane and i were arranging the shoes on the front porch and preparing the left over juice to take drop off on the Ave, when a few girls drove by and shouted up, “hey, where’d you get all those shoes?” we told them to come up and take some, so 2 of them got out of the car and came up to the porch.
they were 18 years old and a little awkard at first. with hooka in hand, you could tell they were disappointed that the Rabbit Hole (the local hooka house) wasn’t opening until 8pm. bummer. we talked for a few more minutes, but in the end they didn’t take any shoes and only about 4 small things of juice. no biggy.
fast foward about 8 hours. me, brookis, alex, and alex are walking back to the house around 1am and we see those same 2 girls (a little more dressed up this time) walking toward us on their way to the Rabbit Hole. they said, “hey, we left you a note,” and then scurried past. we came up to the house where shane said that they had been just a few seconds before and had thrown a crumpled-up note on the porch and ran away.
we gathered around and read the note:
Dear Porch Boys -
Hello, you may remember us from {2 stick figures} asking you about your shoe art earlyier we are @ white rabit blease join us so we can become best friends.
love
{3 stick figures}
leah margoret christine
i have not corrected any spelling and tried to represent it as accurately as possible. if you want to see the real thing, click here.
Filed under: general
Blease tell Christine that I like her hair.
Did you guys become friends? More importantly, are they attractive? Or are they b.u.b.s? Sweet Jesus I need these answers!
they were too young. and more in the “weird and immature” way than in the “hot young girls” way. ya know what i mean? also, they weren’t terribly cute. what is a bub again?
big ugly bitch
I miss you, Brandon.
right right. i should have known.
No 18 year old girl is too young. What a terrible thing to say.
BUB-free since ’01,
Chocolate
it’s not like they were too young physically, they were too young mentally. i mean, in just talking to them for a few minutes i was getting sick. seriously, it seemed like they were 14 years old.
…and yet, that only intrigues me further.
i’m not exactly sure what to say about all this.
That’s… odd. Blease may now become part of my mocking-other-people vocabulary. But seriously, Eli, I’m glad you like the list. Don’t forget to pass it on!
When you’re writing a note by hand, how do you make a “B” instead of a “P”? People make little errors on keyboard, sure, but handwritten is weird. Props.
yeah, and meredith said that i was being unfair about that one. she says that it is “totally” a “p” and that i’m just being picky. so, i looked at the note again, and actually it’s more like a capital “D” if you think about it.