Outside Looking In
by Eli
initially my intent was to use this website to point out all of the absolutely ridiculous things that i see, here, and feel in my life. this theme was consistent enough that i thought i’d surely have enough material for such an endeavor. i never thought i’d be writing about myself.
this past friday, i spent most of the day working at the Chemistry Department here at IU doing web design. that is one of the two jobs that i currently have, and i work there about 3 days a week, depending. it is a wonderful job, and i absolutely LOVE going into work there. i can’t think of a time that i’ve dreaded it. but when it comes to web design, and probably really any kind of design for that matter, you can either sink or sail. some days are amazing: you come in, you work for 7 or 8 hours and everything goes your way. you figure out problems, find solutions, and you do it all with your own intellect. it’s wonderfully satisfying. but sometimes, nothing goes you way, little things stop your progress for hours at a time, and you swear of the entire profession.
so this past friday, i sunk. there were little problems that were annoying the shit out of me and i just couldn’t figure it out. so by the end of the day, i was tired and worn out and not really in the mood for fun. unfortunately, meredith’s mom and sister were in town to have just that. we were all going to soma to hang out and see lacey play. we got there and i still wasn’t in much of a good mood (even though i had a smoothy), but then the music started. first it was a guy i’d never heard before (which i really enjoyed), and then it was lacey. she has such a beautiful voice, it’s hard NOT to enjoy yourself when she plays.
so, by the end of the show, i was starting to enjoy myself. meredith, who’s family had left by this time, was talking about going home and getting some food, and then i had a thought: my mom’s homemade salsa! oh man this is gonna be great, i can’t wait to get home and eat this salsa. WOW!
so, meredith and i walk home and i get there and open the fridge, but i can’t find the salsa. “Where is it?” i ask her. “Oh,” she says, “I’m sorry, I accidentally threw it away. I thought it was that hummus that had gone bad because they were in the same type of container and I just opened it up and dumped it out. I’m really sorry.”
at this point i got ridiculous. such crushing blow sent me well below radar. i just couldn’t imagine someone taking out a container from the fridge, opening it up without looking inside, and then dumping it out. i was shocked. but meredith was being so sweet in trying to make it up to me. she immediately started making me different food and all that, but i was in no mood for comfort. i just couldn’t get over this situation. i think all in all, i was in a bad mood for probably 2 hours (i know, it’s ridiculous). we talked about it for a while, and then when we realized there was no more talking to be done, we watched Cathouse on HBO and then rented Birth (with nicole kidman), which was wonderful by the way.
i look back on this situation now and realize how ridiculous i was being. “It was just salsa, get over it!” but at the time i couldn’t. this sort of thing has happened before (i know, it’s a bummer), but in most cases, if i’m in a bad mood like that, i just go to bed and i know i’ll wake up ok. luckily, this was the case here as well.
I would have been crazy too…why on earth would someone have done that….? Anyway, it was nice of Mere to try and make you some other food. Also, speaking of rridiculous, you spelled “hear” like this, “here”. stupid. oh, and I’m in my new house “hear” in minneapolis. Come and visit.
This is Eli, and as this blog would suggest, I’m feeling a tad ridiculous. See, you might have noticed that recently I’ve been mildly upset with the issue of peak oil, whereby we have used half of our planet’s supply of oil, and the second half will be expensive and difficult to procure. Well, I no longer believe this “absolutely ridiculous” notion that mankind will ever run out of the resources necessary to operate its unstoppable machine of domination. I feel like a Grade-A moron for even indulging the now-foolish-sounding idea of “nonrenewable resources.” Consequently, I’m honestly and sincerely considering changing my blog name to “Abso-fucking-lutelyRetarded.com,” because that’s how I feel right now.
Love,
Eli
well, to reiterate, i am NOT feeling that way, THAT was an imposter. for all of you out there that know we well enough, you know i never sign my name with a capital “E”. HA! now i’d like to see you try and impersonate me again.
maybe i should explain. i’m struggling just the tiniest bit with the low energy on this website. low traffic, low wattage, low excitement, nawmean? so i thought that setting up some sort of “impostor” comment controversy might trigger some action. but pitting two different sides of me against one another has taken its toll on my personal life. with that in mind, i have decided to shelve this ill-concieved attempt at sensationalism, or “yellow journalism.” from now on, all that i write here comes from my heart and is spoken in truth, and that extends to my complete rejection of the peak-oil “hypothesis” and all of its terrifying, yet patently false, implications. fear not of eli falsehoods any longer, gentle reader. i speak not but truth henceforth. end communication.
“lower case E”li
Hmmm, what to do about all of this? It seems as though this imposter has decided to take it to the next level. How on earth to do I manage to write this wrong?
I think I’ll start off by revealing the secret identity of the imposter, “It is YOU Drew Lazzara! Step forward and present yourself!”
“No it’s not!” shouts the indignent imposter.
“It is,” I retort, “and I’d appreciate if you’d refrain from this in the future.”
“So be it.”
Well, that’s settle. Ahhhh….