Close the Door 78 Percent
you know how when you are a kid, you go back and forth about how you want the door to your bedroom open and closed? you want it open so you can see the light from you parents room and know they are still awake. you want it closed to keep out any bad guys that might break in. this all sorta makes sense when you are a kid, but when you are 21 years old? and that’s not even the whole story.
when meredith sleeps over at my place, she is very specific about how much the door to the room is allowed to be open. normally she would just close it all the way because… uh… well, she just wants THE DOOR CLOSED!! but things are different at the ManHammer. here, she wants the door to stay cracked a little bit so that cleo, our precious little tortoise shell cat that we are borrowing, can come in and out as she pleases. her food is in my room and sometimes she’s gotta eat. all this is very understandable, but meredith’s desire for the door to open be for cleo and the door to be closed for her can become very complicated. frequently, the door to the room will be half open as we are about to go sleep, and meredith (upon seeing this) will shoot up out of bed and close the door about 3 more inches. she doesn’t CLOSE the door, she just swings the door nearer the closed position, but by merely a few inches. apparently this little bit (at least 78 precent closed) is the perfect balance between bad guy security and feline mobility. who would have guessed, 78 precent?
and then, on the way back down to the bed, she and i usually bump heads because it’s so freakin’ dark in the room because all the blinds have been pulled and she moves WAY to fast in the dark. then we black out and pass out and have very shaky memories of the previous evening when we wake up with bumps on our heads.
